Patronales

Every town or city in the Dominican Republic has an annual celebration in honor of its Patron Saint called Patronales. Patronales here in El Seibo is the first week of May and is highlighted by the only bullfights left in the Dominican Republic. Yes. That’s right. Bullfights.

A group of 4 volunteers and I hitch hiked from another city in the east to my site on Sunday afternoon to see this for ourselves. Bullfights are one thing. Bullfights in the Dominican are a very scary prospect. The ring is erected for this week only and is located on the western edge of town. Right beside it is the shadiest looking carnival imaginable. The ferris wheel and handful of other rides were clearly first used in 1950’s America and made their way down here after being deemed unsafe for human usage circa 1975.

There are no bleachers or spectator seating set up around the bullring. Instead, there is some plywood placed upon ancient scaffolding that one can stand on for the price of 50pesos ($1.40). Once we secured our vantage point and enough rum to make us forget about our personal safety atop the scaffolding, we patiently waited for the toros to arrive. Random Dominicans entertained the crowd by riding horses, playing stickball and plugging their favorite politician (Elections are May 16^th).

About one hour after they were due (or right on time in the DR), the 5 bulls arrived and everyone got ready for the madness. This isn’t Spain and the fights are to be humane. The matadors evade the bull using a cape but do not kill it. That said, humane treatment of animals doesn’t really exist here.

The first bull charged its way into the ring and the 3 Dominican matadors in full costume (plus baseball cleats) got to work. The matadors walked away unscathed and the toro seemed to lose interest quickly, spending most of his time staring at the positively suicidal spectators lining the inside, yes inside, of the ring. In time, men on horseback entered the ring, roped the bull and drug it away.

This pattern continued more or less with each passing bull. The bulls did get the best of the matadors occasionally, taking them to the ground and giving the crowd something to ‘ooh’ and ‘aah’ about. The one glaring difference was that with each subsequent bull, more and more drunken Dominicans would enter the ring to taunt the toro and try to play matador. Using the shirt off their back or a political poster, they would provoke the bulls and risk their lives.

By the 5^th and final bull, at least 60 Dominicans charged a 2,000 pound animal, pulled its tail, jumped on its back and tackled it to the ground. Pure insanity. One swift kick of the leg or thrust with the horns could have produced serious injuries. In fact, one man died earlier in the week. That death did nothing to deter the locals from risking more death and/or bodily mutilation by playing with dangerous animals.

While this Dominican shitshow was disturbing, it was most definitely entertaining The makeshift ring, the creepy carnival, sketchy scaffolding, the drunk Dominicans. It was a unique cultural experience that only takes place here in my site. That said, I did not make a return trip later in the week. Once was more than enough. I can handle waiting 365 days until the nextPatronales to put myself through that again.